Know Thyself
Is it Really Possible?
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Shakespeare was known for his amazing poetry and practical insights within his poems and his plays. One such memorable line is from the play Hamlet wherein Hamlet’s father gives his son sage advice with the following:
This above all: to thine own self be true, And it must follow, as the night the day, Thou canst not then be false to any man. Hamlet (Act I, Scene 3) |
But, perhaps you read that for the first time and wondered, “Is it possible to really know yourself?” The answer I and many other scholars and counselors will give is, “YES!” That answer begs the question in return: “How do I go about getting to really know myself?”
Not wishing to be simplistic, let me say that learning who you really are is not easy. It is possible. The process will be long and sometimes even painful. But it is worth it. I have often suggested to my students over the years two steps that will (as a minimum) get you started on the path of getting know yourself.
Pay close attention to your thoughts
I once heard about a man who asked his friend to help him find himself. The friend thought for a moment then handed him a mirror. I guess that might sound reasonable to some people, but to me that’s just silly. You are not what you are on the outside. Who you really are is the result of what’s going on inside yourself. And the key to knowing what’s going on inside is to pay close attention to your own thoughts about everything around you.
Matthew Gallizzi, founder of HX Works, an entrepreneurial consulting firm in Los Angeles, says that most people actually believe the stories that we tell ourselves about ourselves. He contends that it is these stories that make us who we are. I hold that these “stories,” as he calls them, are our conscious and unconscious thoughts. Understanding what is going on in your own head is key to true self-awareness.
Change negative thoughts to positive
Your thoughts govern your outlook. There is no other secret than that. My mother told me when I was growing up that my attitude will always determine my altitude. It has taken me over fifty years to realize that she was correct. What I think about and the thoughts that I believe are what make me joyful, sad, elated, deflated, or whatever I’m showing on the outside.
The same holds true for everyone alive. If you change your negative thoughts into positive ones, your entire attitude changes and you feel much better. One of the most quoted Americans of the twentieth century was William Arthur Ward who once said, “Happiness is an inside job.” Remember that if your thoughts make you who and what you are, then make sure that what you think is worthy of the person you want to be.
Changing your thoughts will change your whole outlook on life. I like what Oscar Wilde once wrote: “Be yourself; everybody else is taken.” Loving life only takes a few small steps in your thinking. Instead of thinking, “I’m not as good as John,” change that thought to “What is it about John that I can learn from and make myself better.”
But, sometimes I think most people are afraid of changing the way they are. Change can be scary, of course. But sometimes changing offers us the opportunity to become more of what we were meant to be than something to fear.
In an article in the Huffington Post Online, Abby Rosmarin once wrote: “Truly you’ll find yourself when you’re no longer afraid of meeting yourself … You find yourself when you’re brave enough to remove all the pretty covering and realize you’ve been there all the time.” My encouragement to you is to find the true you and discover that you are far more than you or anyone else ever thought you were.
Think positive thoughts about yourself. You may be joyfully surprised when you do.
Not wishing to be simplistic, let me say that learning who you really are is not easy. It is possible. The process will be long and sometimes even painful. But it is worth it. I have often suggested to my students over the years two steps that will (as a minimum) get you started on the path of getting know yourself.
Pay close attention to your thoughts
I once heard about a man who asked his friend to help him find himself. The friend thought for a moment then handed him a mirror. I guess that might sound reasonable to some people, but to me that’s just silly. You are not what you are on the outside. Who you really are is the result of what’s going on inside yourself. And the key to knowing what’s going on inside is to pay close attention to your own thoughts about everything around you.
Matthew Gallizzi, founder of HX Works, an entrepreneurial consulting firm in Los Angeles, says that most people actually believe the stories that we tell ourselves about ourselves. He contends that it is these stories that make us who we are. I hold that these “stories,” as he calls them, are our conscious and unconscious thoughts. Understanding what is going on in your own head is key to true self-awareness.
Change negative thoughts to positive
Your thoughts govern your outlook. There is no other secret than that. My mother told me when I was growing up that my attitude will always determine my altitude. It has taken me over fifty years to realize that she was correct. What I think about and the thoughts that I believe are what make me joyful, sad, elated, deflated, or whatever I’m showing on the outside.
The same holds true for everyone alive. If you change your negative thoughts into positive ones, your entire attitude changes and you feel much better. One of the most quoted Americans of the twentieth century was William Arthur Ward who once said, “Happiness is an inside job.” Remember that if your thoughts make you who and what you are, then make sure that what you think is worthy of the person you want to be.
Changing your thoughts will change your whole outlook on life. I like what Oscar Wilde once wrote: “Be yourself; everybody else is taken.” Loving life only takes a few small steps in your thinking. Instead of thinking, “I’m not as good as John,” change that thought to “What is it about John that I can learn from and make myself better.”
But, sometimes I think most people are afraid of changing the way they are. Change can be scary, of course. But sometimes changing offers us the opportunity to become more of what we were meant to be than something to fear.
In an article in the Huffington Post Online, Abby Rosmarin once wrote: “Truly you’ll find yourself when you’re no longer afraid of meeting yourself … You find yourself when you’re brave enough to remove all the pretty covering and realize you’ve been there all the time.” My encouragement to you is to find the true you and discover that you are far more than you or anyone else ever thought you were.
Think positive thoughts about yourself. You may be joyfully surprised when you do.
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